I wish there was no snow on the ground. Actually it’s not really all that bad today, but look at the winter road salt that’s spread everywhere. That’s more of a problem, really. I wish there was no salt on the roads. Surely in this day and age they can invent something that helps to melt snow and ice without simultaneously dissolving our cars.
I’d love to be able to take the car out for a blast in the countryside. It’s a nice sunny day. But it’s minus 20 degrees and there is too much snow and salt on the ground. Dammit! Maybe I’ll just go out and sit in the car. Yeah, I will. If it is possible to get the workshop door open, I will do so, and let the sunlight in. Then I’ll sit in the driver’s seat and let my imagination go….!
Hmmm… Maybe I’ll connect the battery and start her up. OK. I’ll do it. Wow it started perfectly. No trouble at all. Idles nice. Never really noticed how little room there is in the car when you have your big mad winter coat on, your slush pants, your Canadian Tire Winter boots and your hat and gloves. I guess I am usually dressed in shorts and t-shirts and runners when I drive this car under normal summer circumstances. Of course there is also naked Fridays, but let’s not talk about that here!!!!
Let me tune in the radio as I sit here with the engine running. Yay! This is the closest thing I can get to actually driving the car at this time of year. Maybe I’ll move the car back a few feet or so. Yay. Ok, now I’ll move it forward again. Alright!!! Is the heater working? Check. Holy smokes it really is hot! Does the horn work? Check. Is the blower motor working at all speeds? Check. Can I slot into each gear as if I was driving? Check. Do the wipers work? Check. Not that this car ever sees rain unless I get caught out in a sudden summer shower. Do the windows buzz up and down? Check. Lights, indicators? Check, check! What else can I do? Not much. Lemmee check the horn again. Yep, still works. I wish I could go for a drive. Ah, did you hear that? The radiator fans just kicked in, right at the correct temperature on the dashboard gauge. They always come on when the gauge points to 8 o’clock. Let me take a peek around the engine. Looks good. No leaks. No strange smells or sounds. Nothing to cause any worries or concerns at all. Great! Back inside the car, everything seems to be working correctly. Did I check the horn? Better be sure. Yep, it still works. Ok, may as well shut her down and disconnect the battery again. It’s such a nice bright day. I really wish I could go for a drive.
Well, may as well close the workshop door, lock up the car and say good night until next weekend or the next mild day. Maybe there will be an above-zero day soon and if the roads look clean enough I can take the car out for a blast. Maybe. But probably not!!!
And as I walk away from the workshop, a thought enters my head: “Did I check the horn?????” ☺
– Sheckulous Wilberforce Tiberius Moriale.